I’m Fed Up with my silent attic of fear, tired of the rocket lottery, and the Tuesday chef’s surprise. I’m tired through ages of being a villain for having the temerity to breath. To be.

To this day, people with blood of innocents on their hands are sentenced to multiple life terms to be served until they re-unite with their loved-ones smiling in exchange for the next hostage.

I extend the hand of friendship; you tell me I insulted you, and then spit my blood on it, time and again.

Fed up? Forgetaboutit.

Concession after Concession

I made concession after concession, committed the cardinal sin of giving up Sinai; a serious bummer that I still don’t think was right. Their last chance was Oslo before evacuating Gaza. I tried my best to appease; Can’t we all get along? Let’s make a deal. I tried to give enough so that there’d be no need to hate. Let’s get along: you live, I live. I offered more than I thought I needed, hoping the peace dividend will return. No, you need to move out; they said.

Blindness of Hate

Such is the blindness of Hate that Ariel Sharon’s visit to the Temple Mount was a dire provocation, a raping of virgin daughters. Despite his ugly 1982 history, he was extending my changed hand of friendship saying: We can live together. We can share this land. No dice. Nope.

I saw that stupid leaders led trusting followers off a cliff, and stupid followers pushed trusting leaders off a cliff. I knew they cared for their young, laughed and cried, had the same hopes and dreams as I, not only hated but loved. Yes, I know they’re Human, we live together, roommates. Humane? You bet.

Hate fear fear Hate

I leaned over backwards, doing my level best to only address the Hate. I’m a terrorist defending myself? They blow up a bus of people on their way to some ordinary job, and then what? I should forget? No harm no foul? Hate fear fear hate.

I won’t be another form of denier pretending that every action of every Jew at every moment of time has been just. Was Dr. Baruch Goldstein’s protégé the powerful oppressor? His heroic indiscriminate terrorist justice was my frustration with the blood of innocence spilled onto his hands by indiscriminate Hate. I wanted that Mouth of Hate mosque razed while full, not just shot up. For every rocket that came, I wanted square miles around the origination razed.

Kach was outlawed as another message in hope of reconciliation. After a time, my Humane intentions died of blood loss. After failing to control the bad and spare the innocent, at my wits end of Humane-approved treatments, and not only of my own choice, but because the situation was getting out of hand with neighbors, I made the conscious decision to get rid of them. Kahane lives more than ever now.

Tit for Tat

As innocent blood is shed every day, as dead as Two-state is dithering and hand-wringing in a tit for tat sham Peace process of Machiavellian Chess maneuvers with security counsel vetoes of people incapable of understanding their defense. The truth to handle is, through milestones of Hate my heart has hardened to setting aside Justice with Compassion and Mercy falderal. We’re blood and religious relatives, siblings. I believe in mercy and compassion, but trust me; I’m Fed Up.

I don’t have a right to exist? As Cain of Abel. I never forgive someone who doesn’t ask; or turn a cheek for insincere repentance. I never say anything I don’t mean, or accept that anything said wasn’t meant. If you say you Hate me, I take your word. You Hate me so I need to stay in my silent attic until I move out? No. Enough. You get to leave.

They Had to Go

They had to go. By any means necessary. Eventually, they’ll figure out that this isn’t a place for them, and Ill have some peace. Ill have my damages and liabilities, but living with Hate makes sick. I don’t like having to drive them out. It isn’t because they aren’t human. I decided that it was either them or me. Fed up? Two-State? Forgetaboutit.